On this page
There is no timetable to follow
People experience grief differently. Feelings may change from one day to the next, and there is no requirement to work through a fixed sequence of stages. Allow yourself space rather than comparing your response with another person’s.
Make the next task smaller
When there is a lot to organise, write down the immediate tasks and ask which can wait. Someone you trust may be able to make a call, bring a meal or accompany you to an appointment. During funeral arrangements, ask us to explain unfamiliar terms and put decisions in writing so you can return to them.
Tell people what would help
You may want to talk about the person, sit quietly with someone or have time alone. A specific request can be easier for friends to respond to than a general offer of help. You can ask someone to check in again later, when the first busy days have passed.
Take everyday care at your own pace
Simple routines such as meals, rest and getting outside when you feel able can give a day some structure. They are not a test of how well you are coping. Let someone know if ordinary tasks are becoming hard to manage, rather than feeling you need to handle everything on your own.
Ask for support beyond the funeral
A GP or a bereavement support organisation can help you explore support suited to your situation. The NHS page below is a useful starting point. Funeral staff can explain arrangements, but a funeral enquiry form is not a counselling or urgent medical service.